याद आ गया आज यूं ही अचानक...

हर स्टेशन पे उतरकर यूँ ही खड़े होना,
गर्मी में जा जा वो मुँह धोना.
वो ऊंघना दिन भर, बस और सोना,
वो नापना क़दमों से ट्रेन का हर कोना!
वो चाय का आना, वो बच्चों का रोना,
याद आ गया सब आज यूँ ही अचानक...
वो दरवाज़े पे ट्रेन के घंटों खड़े होना!

वो खाने की खुशबुएँ जो थी उड़ती
तो खाने को घर के कुछ और तरसना!
वो गोलाई में जब ट्रेन थी मुड़ती
उसे देख बच्चों का वो शोर करना
वो दूर शहरों की बत्तियाँ चमकती,
और सुनसान जंगलों से भी निकलना.
याद आ गया सब आज यूँ ही अचानक...
वो ताली बजाते हिजड़ों का गुज़रना!

A Guest Post Straight From Rob "Diesel" Kroese's Heart!

Recently I sent a message to my blogger friends asking if they would like to participate in a blog tour to help promote my new novel, Mercury Falls. I suggested that participants could do a review of the book, or an interview with me, or whatever they wanted to do. I got plenty of responses (see the ongoing list of participants at my blog), but only one person asked me to do a guest post: Sheen.

When I asked her what she wanted me to post about, she said, and I quote:

Anything that comes from deep within your heart would be awesome! I wouldn't wanna limit your 'expression' in any way! :)

This is what my blog in-pensive-mood.blogspot.com is all about. It bears the deepest of my thoughts and emotions, or those of others, that stir mine somewhere deep.

And I thought: “Sheen doesn’t know me very well, does she? Because if she did, she’d know that I don’t HAVE anything deep within my heart. Except blood, of course, and even that stuff is in and out pretty quickly.”

And after all, this blog tour isn’t about what is or isn’t deep inside my heart; it’s about selling lots of copies of my book, Mercury Falls, so that I can quit my job and live the life of leisure that so many of us crave but only a few of us, such as me, truly deserve.

But then I thought, “What if Sheen sees something in me that I don’t even see in myself? And I looked deep into my heart and realized that, more than selling lots and lots of books, what I really cared about was bringing an end to all the pointless strife and discord in the world.  “Wouldn’t it be wonderful,” I thought, “if everyone in the world could just get along like the giant siblinghood of humankind that we truly are?”

But then I realized that even this noble sentiment was a cop-out. Because beneath my desire for universal getting-along-ness lies a more personal need: the need for reconciliation in my own life, with those people who are closest to me. What I really longed for, underneath everything else, was love and understanding from those around me.

And then I looked under THAT, and realized that underlying it all was a desire to sell lots and lots of books.

Ah! This thin line

I tread this thin line, in this drunk like state.

The thrill's all yours onlooker,
you know--all, right now's at stake!

I for now just tread on...
I have naught to choose!

It's just steps right now,
with minds any but mine.

I'll know if I make it,
I'll know when I emerge

that the line's sanity!

That I tread this thin line

to the other side,

to the side that's mine.

----
[1] naught - nothing

They lie too deep

Thoughts oh so fragile,
from deep within
surface unbeckoned
at unsaid times.
Like effervescence,
oh! hard to hold!
so out of reach,
can't try and touch!

Thoughts oh so fragile,
from deep within
come and go
as they please!
They smile our smile,
and cry our tears
on stealthy toes
come rob our sleep!

Thoughts oh so fragile,

from deep within...

वो कदम

उस ओर से उठे, नज़दीक आये और ठहरे दो पल,

फिर चल दिए, बढ़ गए आगे, नयी दिशा में 

खो गए दुनिया की रंगीनियों में वो दो कदम

और इस रास्ते पे खड़ा बस देखता ही रहा मैं.


बढ़  जाउंगा मैं भी एक दिन,

कब तक ठहरा (देखता) रहूंगा यूँ 

खो रहूँगा भीड़ में दुनिया की, मैं भी,
मील का पत्थर आखिर मैं नहीं.

started from that side, came closer, and stayed for two moments,

then started again, moved ahead/on in a new direction

were/got lost (mingled) in the pleasures of life, those two steps (feet)

and standing on this path I just kept seeing (seeing all this happen)

move ahead/on I too will one day
until when will I stand (looking) like this
I too will get lost in the crowds
a milestone, after all, I am not

Tanha

Dekhiye to lagta hai,
zindagi ki raaho.n mei.n,
ek bhee.d chalti hai.
sochiye to lagta hai,
bhee.d mei.n hain sab tanha.

Jitne bhi yeh rishte hai.n,
kaanch ke khilone hai.n,
pal mein toot sakte hai.n.
ek pal mein ho jaye,
kaun jaane kab tanha!

Dekhiye to lagta hai,
jaise yeh jo duniya hai,
kitni rangeen mehfil hai,
sochiye to lagta hai,
kitna gham hai duniya mei.n,
kitna zakhmi her dil hai.

Woh jo muskurate thay,
jo kisi ko khuwabon mei.n,
apne paas paate thay,
unki neend tooti hai,
aur hai.n woh ab tanha!

Dekhiye to lagta hai,
zindagi ki raahon mei.n,
ek bhee.d chalti hai.
sochiye to lagta hai,
bhee.d mei.n hai.n sab tanha!

Another goodbye? Ah! and the pain?

Nah! The clouds are here, to bring the rain

You say the sun's overtaken now?

He's the one to have made the rain!

So what if it's time for goodbye!

If there's been joy, there'll be pain!

Time to gear up and go on... 

There'll be rainbows yet again!

"मेरी महफ़िल में ज़िक्र तेरा होता है" क्या कह दिया मैंने,
होके मग़रूर ख़ुद को ख़ुदा ही जान बैठा तू!

"merii mehfil mein zikr tera hota hai" kyaa kah diyaa maine,

hoke mag.roor kh.ud ko kh.udaa hi jaan baithaa tuu!

कोई और नहीं

न अजनबी है मुझ से, न ग़म से मेरे, तू
दाग़-ए-दिल-ए-नाज़ुक से मेरे अंजान भी नहीं

है मसरूफ आख़िर कितना, के है औरों से रु-ब-रु
बस ग़म-ए-दिल से मेरे ही परेशान तू नहीं

क्या हो चला है इस कदर बेज़ार मुझ से तू,
के ग़म-ए-दिल से मेरे ज़रा परेशान तू नहीं?

ये फ़िर उसी मुक़ाम पर ले आई मुझे हयात
के मैं हूँ, मेरी तन्हाई है, कोई और फ़िर नहीं!


na ajnabii hai mujh se, na g.am se mere, tu

daag.-e-dil-e-naazuk se mere anjaan bhii nahii.n

hai masruuf akh.ir kitnaa, ke hai auro.n se ru-ba-ru

bas g.am-e-dil se mere hii pareshaan tu nahii.n

kya ho chala hai isa kadar bezaar mujh se tu

ke g.am-e-dil se mere zaraa pareshaan tu nahii.n?

ye fir usii muk.aam par le aayii mujhe hayaat

ke mai.n huu.n, merii tanhaayi hai, koii aur fir nahii.n!

Seasons

Summer and winter, like some friends,
come assert, and thrust and 'stay,'
give in, make room, but know--
they'll go--nothing ever stays!

Spring, like some, comes and goes
short lived though, good while it lasts.

Autumn steals in when it can,
around for a bit, & fades out as quietly.

Rains, like others, charming and fickle,
come and go as they please...
and leave you wanting--for more

With each you wither a little
but you also learn to be!

A New Day

If life seems at its lowest ebb,
Because a day's gone wrong.
Let not your heart be troubled,
For a new day soon will dawn

And we can never be quite sure,
Just what it has in store.
Since each one is so different,
Than the one just gone before

As it penetrates the darkness,
With its soft and tranquil beams.
It calms even the most restless soul,
And brings new hopes and dreams

So when a day's been troubled,
And the night is dark and long.
Lift up your fallen spirits,
For a new day soon will dawn

~Anonymous