April 20, 2013

With atrocities to women taking alarming proportions, who wants to lose peace of mind and sleep and what not, in the name of having daughters?

 A 23 year old here, a 10 year old there...a five year old, a 50 year old, a spy suspect, a war prisoner...I wonder where and what we're headed to, and where the stop is! If there is one, of course.

There have been talks and condemnation of female infanticide and foeticide over and over, time and again, Their being associated to family honour and so on too sees the disapproving eye with "why associate them with family honour?".

"Well, why not?!"


With atrocities to women taking alarming proportions, would people want to lose peace of mind and sleep and what not, in the name of having daughters?

What is the man supposed to do? Go out to earn his family's livelihood, or sit guard on his womenfolk? And, if he sits guarding them, who gets the bread home?!

Those that have and bring up daughters live constantly through the hell called 'the fear (the trauma) of the daughter being assaulted, violated any minute'! Some come out unscathed, others end up being not so lucky.

And what next?
Marry her off to some brute who'll beat her for more dowry...burn her alive?!
 OR
Die of shame if she was violated, for there's no groom to ever wed her (or even her sister/s), there's no neighbourhood that will let you and her be, that will let you and her heal--so there's no 'normal' life for them, if there can be one, that is.

Where lie the roots of female infanticide/foeticide, then? And their association with family honour? It is high time we think hard on this one!

No, this is no justification for female infanticide/foeticide. These are atrocities too, and call for condemnation big time! These could serve as excuses...even reasons though.
...the thought process?



We have to make the world safe for women (age no bar)!

"Yea, so what's new in this? Don't we all already know this?" You'd want to say.

"Sure! You surely do! This isn't new(s) of course! Okay, so give us the new/s--what is your bit in helping make the world safe for women?

...As safe as it is for men, to begin with."

January 19, 2013

Dare I say?

Why do movies with item numbers make a bigger dent on the box office? Why does an item number always make it, even if the movie bombs? Why do movies 'have' item numbers, to begin with?
Right! We all have the answer...

There's no denying that we are a country of the masses, and are we talking masses around, these days?

Well, ours is a closed society, a closed culture, where most of the population still is far far from the 'urban' world. Here most families still have their daughters clad from head to toe, tucked into the deeper recesses of their homes--literate or not...sheltered, 'protected'!

Yes, ours is a closed society, a closed culture, but the fabric isn't sturdy as new anymore! It's not without peep holes!

What's all this here, about?

Well, aren't there guys that say why they 'enjoy' women's tennis games on TV? Or that they find dogs better off for their just whenever...with just 'whoever' advantage?

Oh yea! We are a closed society, a closed culture still, but not without these peep holes--the tennis in shortest of short skirts, the item numbers...the count just begins here!

It's the beginning of transition...a journey that's never easy! We have cities with their upcoming urbans juxtaposed with the 'not urban yet', still...and there have to be consequences!


Just the other day there was report of some north Indian states having a high ratio of crimes with a sexual orientation, and a low women to men ratio. Well, isn't the picture clear then? Do we need everything said out loud and clear?!


A closed patriarchal society, with members among the masses who excite at the sight of mere mini skirts in a game of tennis, teased by the likes of item numbers and left to fend for themselves...

Oh yea, there's people being heard saying girls have to be more clad, and not instigate crimes against them...and there's ridicule of it! But let's look at it. It's not all baseless! Yes, there are such crimes against fully clad women, and even little girls, then aren't the less clad ones easier targets, given that they would excite fancies easier?! No! We definitely aren't talking 'rights' here!

Ours has been a land of segregation, of purdah (veil) for many a century, and it's bound to enrage the the guardians of such a society, to see the purdahs being discarded...well, have we ever thought why this purdah even came into being, in the first place? No, I'm no advocate of it...of anything, nor a critic!

Well, why did women start 'jauhars'? Oh yea, they did it on their own...the cause, the reason not being 'their own' of course!

If we come to asking questions, there would be no end to it! Did we ever think, 'when it's between kings and kingdoms, why do the women of the overtaken almost always have to pay the price with their honour'? Be it a holocaust, an army siege...no matter what!

Well, for that matter, why do some countries need extreme punishments such as stoning to death/hanging for crimes against women?

It all needs to be thought through, and thought well...

April 28, 2012

Curfewed Night by Basharat Peer: A Review


Curfewed NightCurfewed Night by Basharat Peer
My rating: 5 of 5 stars


A heart-wrenching saga of a people trapped between layers upon layers of bureaucracy, politics, systems, processes and the like, in the name of, for the sake of independence, religion, justice. A saga that leaves one chilled to the very bones, yet warmed to their immense faith and hope, in the face of all adversities and sheer atrocities they breathe every breath through, in the name of 'life', in the hope of 'life'.

They are all trapped--the locals, the militants, the soldiers, the paramilitaries--in processes, in being parts of processes...all of them dead, either in bodies or in souls, having to bury and cremate the individuals they had once been, as the author puts it.

Leaves me compelled to reach out to the people so like us, yet rendered so different at the hands of the strife!

View all my reviews

April 12, 2012

On a journey...

On a journey  to far away,
nothing to hold on to, Ah! No crutch!

Somewhere out there to perch,
beyond all reach and of touch.

View what befalls the sight,
too far to see, or say much.

On a journey  to far away,
beyond all reach and of touch.

Embark, head on to,
no step to fall in with, no hand to clutch.

Somewhere out there to perch,
too far to be seen, or to touch.

On a journey  to far away,
nothing to hold on to, Ah! No crutch!

April 7, 2012

ये घटा नहीं बरस पाएगी...


आज फिर, लगता है, ये घटा नहीं बरस पाएगी...
आज फिर ये हवा साथ इसको ले जायेगी!
रोज़ ही, कुछ दिन से यूँ घटा छाती है,
रोज़ ही मगर, बिना बरसे चली जाती है.
रोज़ ही दिल में एक उम्मीद सी होते ही जवाँ,
मन मसोस, खड़ी देखती रह जाती है.
कि जो छाती है घटा उम्मीद के निशाँ लेकर,
वो कहीं और जाकर बरस जाती है!
 

aaj phir, lagta hai, ye ghata nahin baras paayegi...
aaj phir ye havaa saath isko lejaayegi!
roz hi, kuchh din se yuun ghataa chaatii hai,
roz hii magar, binaa barse chalii jaatii hai.
roz hii dil mein ek ummiid sii hote hii javaa.n,
mann masos, khadii dekhtii rah jaatii hai.
ki jo chaatii hai ghataa ummiid ke nishaa.n lekar,
vo kahii.n aur jaakar baras jaatii hai!

February 23, 2012

I am...what you made me...eh life!

I signed up for NCC (National Cadet Corps) during my three years of graduation, my first step towards making it to the Republic Day Camp (RDC), at New Delhi (the Mecca for all NCC cadets). One and a half year of rigorous training and loads of hard work bore fruit, and I made it to the RDC. While at the Pre-RD camps I signed up also, for YEP--which meant I would be one of the cadets from India, to represent her in the country I would be sent to, as an 'Exchange Participant', IF selected, of course! Yes, YEP meant Youth Exchange Programme. YEP definitely would be not just a(nother) feather in the cap, but also the bigger and more vibrant one. So, the entire group of YEP signees were on the most serious mission of their lives--being selected! Losing a few hours of sleep each day, in the name of tests and discussions for preparation didn't look like much of a sacrifice!

So, the day soon arrived, a couple of months post RDC, when all the efforts and hard work bore an excellent fruit, and the best news of my life, ever, arrived...yes! I was selected for the ICYEP (Indo-Canada Youth Exchange Programme)! "Seven months on the Programme!" My elation knew no bounds! For, ICYEP is a prestigious cultural exchange programme for the youth (the best of NCC's YEPs), where in the NCC cadets are are looked up to, to represent the beautiful culture called India, in its entirety! My elation and all that is another journey of course, and I would rather not venture on to that road, here...

A couple of months of preparation, and we were all set to go! Two teams of twenty five cadets each. One headed to Toronto, the other, to Vancouver. I went to Vancouver, and never came back the same person!

After a couple of weeks of orientation and acclimatization we finally arrived at the communities we were to be in, for the next three months, a small group of eight Indians, each with a Canadian counterpart, put up as a counterpart pair, with a host family, as a part of it, during our stay. Our routine there mainly included voluntary community service four days a week. The 'work placements' as they were called, were judiciously chosen, and we were all thrilled to be of some use there!

I of course, couldn't have asked for a work place better than the one I had been assigned! The Hilltop House--a senior citizens' home nested on the hill top, in the breathtakingly beautiful, Squamish! Every moment spent at the Hilltop House was sheer bliss for us both--my counterpart and me. So much so, that we always made time to return there to spend at least part of our Saturdays and Sundays with the residents. It was as enriching, as fulfilling it was, to be in company of those lovely people who showered us with immeasurable amount of affection and wisdom! The short span of three months there, left an indelible mark on my personality, and changed me for good! I learnt a lifetime worth of lessons--even more--in that short span! And all this, because of the beautiful people I met there!

Edith Maggie, an extremely affectionate lady, nearing ninety, had been a missionary in India, and nothing gave her more pleasure than seeing me come by! "Here comes my sweet darling as beautiful as her country India!" was her usual welcome note for me, or, "My! How beautiful my bitiya (daughter) looks in her salwar kameez and odhni, with that bindiya on her forehead!" I'd revel in all that affection she would shower on me, realizing little, about the indelible mark she was making on my life! She had Alzheimer's and there were days when she couldn't recall where she was, and who the people around her were...but she somehow always recognized me, and would ask me to help her find her lost shoe, (that she's sometimes be sitting on, on her wheel chair). Immense love from Edith taught me the best lesson of life. That there is no happiness in this world greater than giving happiness and love to those around you! That a touch of affection/love, a smile straight from your heart has the power to soothe and calm even an Alzheimer stricken person, when in deepest of her trauma, of having just been miraculously saved from being drowned by some nasty women! (Edith's bathing days were worst days for her!) The smile that lit up on her face through tears rolling down her cheeks, gave me such great happiness, that no words can ever describe! She loved my visits, for, they transported her to her happy days! And for me, I couldn't get enough of her affection! I always thirsted for more...still do!

Mary Campini, another resident citizen at the Hilltop House, was a beautiful woman with a dainty figure, somewhere in her late seventies. A very gentle, polite person, thoroughly graceful...I loved being with her! She would smile and greet me each day, and always keep a chocolate or some goodies for me! She taught me to make the most of  the time you have, and not to put away for tomorrow, what you really want to do/get from life! That was her life's biggest learning, she'd say. She helped me chisel my love for travel, in its very early stage, through her accounts from her life's experiences...though this wasn't all.

My love for scrabble came from daily scrabble sessions with Mary Donald, a short tempered old woman, who left nothing unsaid, if you rubbed her the wrong way, by way of winning over the game, or something! Too proud to ask you for a game each day, though all she wanted was for you to play scrabble with you. Each day, I'd walk up to her, where she sat alone, scrabble on the table, and ask if she'd do me a favor and let me play a game with her. The glow on her face at that was my reward each day...as also was humility, that I didn't realize then, I imbibed in ample measures!

Reene, a quiet woman, always found in the activity room, like Mary Donald, but with a deck of playing cards, was another person I spent some time with, daily. She'd play rummy all day, punctuated with her meals, or short walks out in the lawn. Reene was 88 years, a person of few words, each a very meaningful one, at that! Serene, unruffled by anything, self contained--that was Reene who had pleasantness writ large over her entire persona. Walks with her were very enriching indeed, for she taught me things so powerful, so very subtly!

Mr. Kurtenacker had a few 'couple-of-thousand piece' completed jigsaw puzzles under his belt, that dwarfed the walls of his room; and a flourishing little garden blooming with pretty flowers and some vegetables...need I say I always got greeted with a lovely flower and a "How u doing today, sweetheart"? A very happy man--never as old as his age, wiser though--who endeared himself to anyone he met--though the last was small! The reason--he was hardly left with any time to socialize with people, from his busy schedule of socializing with and dating nature! Wow!

Those three months were much shorter than usual, and soon I found myself gone from the Hilltop House! We performed a small cultural show for the citizens there, (our entire group of 16 participants) as a mark of out respect to them, and as our way of bidding goodbye. (Tough, tearful goodbyes had already been shared earlier! With promises to return asap! Promises I have yet to be able to keep...promises I long to keep!)

The last I saw of Mr. Kurtenacker was at our community cultural show, with his date, the beautiful Mary Campini, whose nails I'd filed and polished a couple of days ago...Reene, and Mary Donald had made it too, with some others...

Little had I know then, that a few months' hard work and sacrificing some hours' sleep for a few month, could (would) bring such immeasurable returns that enriched me for more than a lifetime! A rewards much larger than the ones I'd aspired for--the pleasure of having the RDC and ICYEP feathers adorn my cap!

This chapter of my life still remains incomplete though, for I have promises to keep--to them, (who, may not even be around anymore!) and to me--I (still) have to go back to Hilltop House...I must! (I hope with all my might, that I do!) Yes...I pine for more! I will! For, I will know no rest until!

February 10, 2012

भोर अब हो ही गयी

थे अँधेरे घने, जलाए मैंने चिराग बहुत
थे अँधेरे घने,  जलाए रखे चिराग मैंने अब तक
अब तो सो रहूँ, जागा हूँ रात भर का मैं
अब तो सो लूं के भोर अब होने लगी
सो रहूँ अब, के भोर अब होने लगी
बस, सो रहूँ अब, के भोर अब हो ही गयी.

आ लगा ले गले

आ लगा ले गले,
के थक गया हूँ बहुत, चलते चलते.
दूर ठिकाना, और धूप भी बड़ी घनी,
ढूंढा बहुत न मिली छाँव ज़रा भी कहीं.

आ लगा ले गले, 
के थक गया हूँ बहुत, चलते चलते.
ढूंढा बहुत न मिली मगर मंजिल मेरी.
ढूंढा बहुत न मिली मगर जो थी ज़िन्दगी.

आ लगा ले गले, 
के थक गया हूँ बहुत, चलते चलते.
आ लगा ले गले,
के तेरे आँचल में सो रहूँ चुपके से मैं भी.